To smartphone or not to smartphone

That truly is the question.

I know, the answer is so obvious, right?  Well screw you! It’s really not that obvious to me.  Let me bare my telesoul to all of you and explain why (my god, why?!) I’ve avoided the smartphone like the plague and perhaps why now, I’m considering it.

This here is my current phone in all of its glory – except mine has a colour screen (I know, that makes such a huge difference):

The phone has done me well – it has good reception, I can text without looking at the buttons (jealous?), the given ringtones are pretty catchy, has that snake game, and it does absolutely nothing more which is perfectly all I need.  Wait a second, no data plan?  No video?  No camera?  OK well, that’s just being rude and insulting, now.  Of course it has a camera but I can’t upload the fuzzy pictures to anything.  Oh, the phones of yesteryears.  I know grandparents who have better phones.

Honey?  I’m phone!

I have a love/hate relationship with phones.  Let’s start off with me being a teacher.  My classroom is a constant head-on battle with these phones for attention from my students.  The only reason I became a teacher was for the attention.  I’m witty, intelligent, endearing, cute, and I know the boys are checking out my butt when I write on the board (it’s a bit better than average).  What else could these students want or desire?  Oh right, social networking is way more fun than an education!  This head-on battle is more so a head-on defeat – for me.

Secondly, I thoroughly enjoy the reactions I get when people see my phone.  I’ve gotten: “Let me see that pathetic thing, again?”  I’m pretty sure these people are impressed with my nonchalant, carefree, anti-capitalistic ways and don’t think I’m the biggest loser.  My friends even tell others to check out my phone: “She just got colour.  Her last one was a green and black screen 7-11 phone.”  And there I am, all smug and proud of this Nokia slide phone I asked my brother to get me for Christmas.  I was excited to get it and will admit that it is a bit of an attempt to show others that we don’t need these fancy and expensive products.  Sixty bucks for a plan?  Mine’s $25.  But, really, do I have anything to show for any of this other than really falling behind the times?

Finally, who here really needs to be that connected, please raise your hand?  You?  You, too?  And, you.  Hmm, that’s interesting.  There’s only three of you here so that makes 100 percent of the population.  Alright, I digress.  We all want to be completely connected and a smartphone makes it just that much easier.  I sometimes have the need to disconnect and have taken holidays where I’ve purposely released myself from all contact.  It’s perfectly ‘OK’ and not stressful at all.  I mean, I might rip 1/5 of my hair out, get the jitters anytime I see some sort of technology (even a microwave) and keep ‘checking’ things a la OCD.  We are slaves to this virtual world we have created.  I fear the more connected I am, the harder it will be for me to leave that virtual world.  Our slow movement towards total technology dependency creating the depressing end of the ‘face-to-face’ has been another reason why I have resisted. 

But…

Resistance is futile!

I realise this.  And so, the iPhone is in my near future.  I feel like I have a good reason, though.  I’m travelling for two months and want to truly grab the essence of my time away. I’d like to have a ‘thing’, a ‘capturer of life’, a ‘documenter of my crazy and zany day-to-day’, a ‘note-taker for the memoire I might write’, and in fewer words, a smartphone.  I get it.  I get why you all have one and why you begin to panic when you can’t find it for those 30 seconds.  I want that feeling.  I really do!  I want….a smartphone.

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